Fundamentals #3 – The method to change the negative beliefs about yourself
You can have anything you want if you are willing to give up the belief that you can’t have it
Beliefs are in some ways assumptions we make about ourselves, about others, and about how we expect things to be in our world.
We have all these theories, ideas and explanations about how things are and what they should be like. Likewise, we make all these conclusions about life and about other people, all of which help us make better sense of the world.
In other words, we use beliefs as anchors that help express our understanding of the world around us.
You believe something because you have a certain set of rules that tell you that this “something” makes sense and is true. Therefore if the rule makes sense, then it only makes sense to believe that what you’re seeing and experiencing is the truth.
Let’s say for instance that you come across a specific situation. Your brain will ask whether making a certain decision or taking a specific action will mean pain or pleasure. You then either decide to take action that helps you avoid pain, or to gain pleasure. Whatever you decide to do provides you with insight into the underlying hidden belief that is at the core of that particular psychological rule.
It’s important to keep in mind that these beliefs where only once ideas, that became opinions, and later came together to form your beliefs. As such, they aren’t real !
So, you understand that beliefs are a pattern and are different from one to another. Therefore they can be changed !
How to transform your limiting beliefs into empowering belief ?
I suggest you to take a sheet and a pen and write down the answers of the following questions.
You can ask someone else to ask you those questions and try to answer honestly.
Step 1: Choose your desired outcome
By focusing on what you want, you create clarity about what you’d like to change, ask yourself the following questions:
- What goals would I like to achieve?
- What’s currently preventing me from achieving these goals?
- What kind of person would l ideally like to become?
- What is it specifically that I would like to change?
- What specific beliefs are not working for me?
- What beliefs are preventing me from achieving my desired outcomes?
Step 2: Question those beliefs
Once identified, the objective is to thorw doubt into those beliefs.
Some of these questions might seem silly and strange, however they are designed to help you expand your perspective and the possibilities of your situation. They are designed to force you to think outside the box !
- Have I always believed this? Why?
- Was there a time when I didn’t believe this? Why?
- Are there times in some situations when this belief just doesn’t make any rational sense?
- What evidence is there that disproves this limiting belief?
- What’s the exact opposite way of thinking about this belief? How is this helpful?
- What is funny about this belief? What’s strange about this belief? What’s embarrassing about this belief?
- Is this belief helping me get what I want most in life? Will it help me reach my goals?
- How would others tend to question the validity of this belief? How would they think about it?
- How does the opposite of what I believe work for other people? How is this of value?
- What famous quotes throw doubt upon this limiting belief?
- What are the critical flaws in believing what I believe? How is it silly to think this way?
- How would I think about this belief if I was Albert Einstein? Elon Musk ? Leonardo Dicaprio ?
Step 3: Think about the consequences of your limiting beliefs
Having thrown doubt upon your limiting belief in the previous step, it’s now time to consider the consequences of holding onto this belief in both the short and long-term. Really have a good long and hard think about the following questions:
- What will the consequences be if I am unable to make this change and eliminate this limiting belief?
- How will not changing affect me physically? Emotionally? Spiritually? Financially? In my relationships with others?
- How will not changing affect my life?
- What are the short-term consequences of not changing?
- What are the potential long-term consequences of not making this change?
- How will all this make me feel?
- Given all this, why is it important to make this change right now?
Got it ?
Now You know what prevents you to live the life YOU want to live. Those questions help to have a breakthough and make you realise that if you continue with those beliefs – nothing good will come out.
The next step is about making a plan and taking MASSIVE action !
Nothing is impossible and the only limits we have are those we set ourselves.
- You’d like to quit your job to get a job you love ? We are almost 7 billions inhabitants on Hearth, don’t you think you can find a job that fits you ?
- You want to have a girlfriend ? Gain knowledge, read books about this subject, strive for a better you, change your style, your attitude etc.. We are almost 7 billions inhabitants on Hearth, half are girls, don’t you think you can find someone that fits you ?
- You want to get the body you’ve always dreamt of ? Again, gain knowledge, invest money with high level coach, be consistent and hit the bench 4 times a week !
- You want more friends ? Learn the technics to be more attractive, transform yourself, everything is possible !
- You want more money ? Make this your obsession and your priority ! You will find a good business idea and make money.
This is also important to VISUALISE your future life without those limited beliefs. To me, regular meditation sessions helped me a lot to get rid of those limiting beliefs and visualise my life how I want it to be !
All the big things built on this planet needed persistence, effort, dedication to be what they are today.
Take action and get into the habit of using your new empowering belief as often as possible until it begins to feel comfortable and familiar. Don’t wait – START.
You may of course need to get through that initial awkward stage where you feel a little discomfort and uncertainty. That’s normal.
With persistence, dedication and commitment you will get through it. Just keep moving forward.
It might be helpful to write down your new belief/beliefs on a sheet of paper and carry them around with you throughout the day. Read your new beliefs as often as possible until they begin feeling comfortable and natural.
Tips: Your subconscious mind records everything you give to it. Draw on a piece of paper a statement that you’ll read aloud 5-10 times before going to sleep and when you wake up in the morning.
A great book helping you to build a great set of statement that I personally recommend is The Power of Your Subconscious Mind
Thanks a lot for reading and let me know what you feel about this in the comments !